He hogs the bed. He pushes me to make space for himself. Scream at him and he screams louder. He refuses to accept his mistake and rarely ever shows a tinge of guilt for misbehavior. He demands immediate attention whenever he fancies. He expects everyone to be at his beck and call and wait on him paw and foot. He is at his irritable best when corrected. He doesn’t take refusal lightly either. He simply has to have his way. He wins arguments because of sheer might and perseverance. He has to have the last word. He treats the grassy park downstairs, cars parked around it and even my living room as his personal toilet. He scoffs at baths, manicures and any other attempt at cleanliness saying they are for ‘poodles’. This fellow is no metrosexual! He loves his meat well-done,rare. He likes milk He has an amazing apetite and does not watch his weight at all. Diets are for bimbos and blondes. A good dump in the morning is his idea of a wonderful start to his day. He wants breakfast served the minute he finishes potty. All hell breaks loose if you dare make him wait. Exercise is a must. He runs a couple of miles morning and evening. He kicks the ball around and watches it spin and swerve. He rarely ever misses his aim. His headers are fierce. Aggressive on the field and level-headed off it. He is well on his way to be the next Zidane. With him what you see is what you get. No pretense and no politesse. Enter his domain at your own peril and only if ready to be subjected to serious scrutiny. He is sure as hell judgemental. If you pass the test, you are welcome. If he takes a liking to you, he will make you feel welcome. Most get the cold shoulder and many the royal snub. But that’s only because he is very protective of his family. He loves them to bits. When he sleeps, its always on his back, his assets proudly on display. Quite an exhibitionist this bloke, proudly giving the full frontal show of his package! Caesar is an alpha-male alright…
